Merry Christmas!!

Merry Christmas everyone!! I hope all of you have a wonderful time with family and friends and that the ones you hold dear are near. I spent my Christmas Eve at my uncle and aunt's house, with my family and had a very enjoyable time and absolutely scrumptous dinner and dessert. Today is with my "Doo" and my grandmother and family. Which should also be a very nice time. Although admittedly I'm finding it difficult to get into the "holiday spirit" without Shawn being here. We're going to have our own small Christmas when I move. We're going to have a big ham with potatoes and green beans, and pies, and yummy stuff and invite a few of his guys over to eat on bean bags in our living room floor that won't have any furniture for the first little while. Lol. That's what I'm really looking forward to, not that this Christmas I'm not enjoying myself it's just a little bit more difficult.

Other than that everything is going well I'm slowly but surely packing away and getting ready to make the move to the frozen tundra. Lol. Hope you have an awesome Christmas!

Moving, short hair, tickets, and babies.

Everything is really beginning to change. I've cut my hair for the maintenance aspect of it but it also marks the beginning of this chapter. And I've been so buried in work that I haven't been able to focus on the fact that I'm moving. I have gotten about 6 boxes/totes packed but it hasn't really hit me.

But just a moment ago I realized that in juat ten days I'll be moving to Alaska, to finally join my husband, in our house. I am so excited to be joining him. For the last year we have done the long-distance relationship thing and I am over it. What's so funny is that we have spent more time apart in the last year than we will when he's deployed. I'm sure there will be a difference in the emotions in being apart but at least I know I have handled the length of time before.

But I'm not thinking about that right now. All I want to think about is setting up a home with Shawn and getting into a routine with a new job and completely new lifestyle. Going from the country to a neighborhood and having not only a next door neighbor but someone who lives in the same dwelling as us...(it 's a duplex.) I'm also going to have to get used to having one vehicle between the two of us, which is weird because I've never really had to "share" a vehicle before, so I think that's going to drive me a little crazy at first. I am really excited about learning to cook and making his lunch for him for work and making love on the living room floor or the kitchen counter. ;) I know these novelties will eventually wear off but either way I'm really looking forward to enjoying the "honeymoon" stage of our marriage.

On a slightly bad note I looked up airplane tickets and they are $2000 for Jan. 5th and sold out every day before that. On the slight up side on the 7th they go back down to $800. On a all-readers-cross-your-fingers-and-pray-for-us note we find out if the Army will pay for it on Monday which would be an amazing Christmas present.

As everything begins to take shape for the move, for this new journey, it is bittersweet. I am truly ecstatic about going to be with Shawn but I know it's going to be a difficult transition going from everyone I know and love to knowing no one. But if I'm anything I know I'm strong and can handle it, especially knowing that on days when I'm struggling I can curl up next to him and fall asleep in his arms. Anyway friends I'm going to try to post a Christmas blog so sleep well tonight

and I will type to you soon. :)

PEE ESS: I think I may be getting the 'baby fever' :)

We Got the House!!

Well we got the place! Shawn says the kitchen is huge and it is really pretty. The landlord seems to be a really nice guy and is willing to work with us. I think Molly will really like it too, with the stairs and being the only puppy to get spoiled by her mom and dad. And I think that I'll really be able to spend time with her the way she deserves and take her with me when I'm running errands and take her to Petco to get her her coats and booties and everything. Speaking of coats and booties my darling husband went shopping for me yesterday and bought me boots, a jacket, a couple under shirts, a scarf, pretty wool socks, and a knitted hat. :) Let me just say that he is the most adorable person ever.

Actually speaking of adorable unbeknowst to us our wedding rehearsal was taped and towards the end there is a part where Shawn comes up behind me and kisses my shoulder and I look up at him and he gives me a quick peck and then coyly looks away and then comes in slowly for another quick peck and then looks away and then when he turns back around I give him a quick peck until he puts his arm around my waist and we rub noses and I giggle. I thought it was the most adorable thing ever. Mom just thought we were sickening, although I must admit we get that a lot too. Especially from my friends at work. ;) Love you guys!

Anyway that's about all the news I've got for now. I've started packing, I'm working my tush off, and enjoying some time with my friends before I leave. OH! And I'm getting my hair cut tomorrow which I'm super excited/nervous about so wish me luck! Merry Christmas to everyone if I don't post again.

The Characteristics of the Perfect Man

So I was told that my blogs were a bit sad so I've decided to lighten the mood and come up with a list of qualities that make Shawn the perfect man.

1) He can always make me smile. Whether it's mentioning that he is going to get me a dragon or that I'm the prettiest woman he knows. You see I've mentioned before that I have a slight obsession with dragons and so whenever I get upset or down about something he'll always say that he'll make it all better and buy me a dragon. :)

2) He listens, and not the "uh huh" listen he really listens to my day or what I have to say on a certain subject. Like the other day about the duplex we're looking to rent. I was really upset about him not wanting to move on it and he pried why I was upset out of me and then sat there and listened to my reasons as to why I think we should move on the place.

3) He remembers the little things; my favorite movie, color, food, flower, etc. There was one time that I had an awful day at work and he brought me home a boquet of wildflowers to make it better.

4) He makes me feel sexy when I'm wearing no make-up, am in sweatpants, and on pain meds. I got my wisdom teeth pulled out in January and he came over that evening and curled up next to me and told me that I was the sexiest doped up person he knew. Lol.

5) He does the cheezy love story movie stuff. Ya know, the stuff that every woman is like "OMGosh I soo wish real men would do that" and he does it. For one of our anniversaries he got a star named after me and after a particuraly bad fight he carved our initials into my tree.

6) He's an amazing lover. Nuff said. :)

7) He tried to teach me how to dance, he is going to teach me how to shoot, and how to drive on icy roads.

8) He holds my hand in the car and we kiss at red lights. There are very few moments when we're together that we aren't connected in some way or another.

9) He listens to my music and watches my movies too. When he came home for our wedding I was slightly obsessed with "How to Train Your Dragon" and we sat down and watched it just cause I wanted him to.

10) He takes the time to make me fall in love with him all over again. We've had picnics by the river, sunrises on the beach, engagement ring in the champagne glass, gone horse back riding, and had many a romantic night in.

11) He isn't afraid to be vulnerable around me. And as odd as that sounds when I realize that he can be as vulnerable as I am its comforting and kinda sexy. When I visted him in August after he left the room he called me crying saying that he didn't want me to leave. We stayed on the phone for another 3 hours just talking and telling each other how much we love one another.

12) But one of the things that make him even more perfect is that he's not. He makes mistakes, he has flaws, and he's not afraid to admit them. He is a strong and proud man who isn't afraid to use his gun or to express his love.

Shawn is amazing to me and is so good to me. We have grown some together over the last couple of years and I look forward to growing closer together over the next several years. He completes me in every way possible and I can't imagine life without him and I am thankful each day that we found one another and we have made it to this point in our lives. I love you honey.

Pee Ess: And he let's me do chubby bunny. :D

Moving and stuff

So the day began like a few from the last week or two, me in a funk because I'm missing Shawn and worried about everything butttt I am in a much better mood after having a really nice time with my grandmother and a really good talk with him tonight.

You see I have been scouring the internet trying to find places to rent and send his way to check out. The first one was a dump but the one he went and looked at last night had everything we wanted except a w/d and it's a bit more than what we wanted to spend. But it has wood floors, a fenced yard, 15 minutes from base, a bed (we didn't have one of those yet), and a month to month lease. It was perfect in my opinion but he wanted to shop around a bit more and make absolute certain that this was it. And as soon as I got on the phone with him last night I knew it would be so it was difficult for me to say "ok" and not be upset, but I didn't succeed and he ended up dragging it out of me and so we talked about everything and I think we're going to try to talk to the guy this weekend about working out a lease for Shawn and I. I'm not letting myself get too excited until we come up with some solid paperwork and it's 100% ready for us to move in. Which means I could be up there a lot earlier than we thought. Easily by the first if everything continues to go smoothly. We also spoke of other bills; getting me onto his car insurance and cell phone bill. We figured out that combining our cell phones would end up saving us over $100 a month. So all in all we accomplished a couple of good things tonight...AND he got me "Beauty and the Beast" for Christmas!!! I am so freaking excited!!! I don't think he realizes what kind of brownie points he received, although I'm not sure he'll think it was worth it when we're watching it for the 3rd time in a week. Lol.

So basically it was an overall good day. Tomorrow is a double at work, although I'm really hoping to get out of my dinner shift so I can pack. The next couple of weeks I feel will be kinda crazy getting everything ready for the move, which is also exciting. Other than that everything else is normal. Hope all of you are doing well and liked the pictures from the wedding. :)

Wedding Pictures 2

Wedding Pictures

Pictures, paperwork, and lots of work

I received my wedding pictures yesterday and let me just tell you they are awesome and have put me back into a very good mood today. The pictures show just how happy we were and how much fun everyone had. It also showed how beautiful the centerpieces, cake, and reception decor was. And I love how well Shawn and I photograph. He makes me so crazy happy.

As you know we have been doing a ton of paperwork this last week but hopefully it will begin to pay off as we look into rentals this week. It's been slightly more difficult because of having Molly but I think it will work out. I found one place today that not only allowed pets, but is supposed to have an awesome view, all utlities paid, and it has a porch. :) I love porches. lol.

On a seperate note today is my only day off from work this week, it's back to the grindstone big time over the next couple weeks before the big move. I think once we're all settled in everything, financially, will be ok. We don't have any astronomical bills or debt. Although we both can be spontaneous shoppers, so that's something we'll have to control a bit better. Lol. But as the days pass and the day to me leaving becomes closer I teeter between scared out of my mind to being so excited to begin this adventure. Either way I can't wait for the big day to get here.

Today though is a laid back day after a long weekend at work and a longer week ahead of work. I'm going ice skating with one of my best friends tonight and I think tomorrow I'm doing lunch with my sister and Dad. So that will be nice as well. I hope you enjoy the pictures and have any awesome work week. :)

Pee Ess: My next blog or two will be just pictures from the wedding. :)

Panic and my favorite video

I know that the last couple blogs I've written have been a little less "bubbly" than my normal writings but the one thing I want more than anything is 5000 miles away and there are fleeting moments where I feel like he isn't as excited as I am, or as anxious. I just miss him like crazy and it's made me a little crazy. Lol. Tonight we got on the phone after I got off work and he told me that he was in a pickle. And proceeded to ask if he should stay on the phone with me (because I take precedence) or if he should get off the phone and go hang out with the guys in his room. And so, trying to keep the conversation light, I replied "Would you like the politically correct answer? Or the jealous wife answer?" You see when I hang out with my best friend Shawn knows that 1) Either don't call me at all OR 2) If he does call it will be very short. Now this is the difference. Even if I didn't leave my best friends house until 12 it's still 8 where he's at. So he can have an hour conversation with me and still have the night to him and his friends. But then the weekend comes along and I get off work late and he's wanting to hang out with his buddies (which I encourage and support!) but it interferes with our night time conversations. Now I realize how ridiculous that may sound but between the time difference and our jobs Midnight my time, eight o' clock his time, is basically are unofficial block time to catch up with one another. And when I get mad, or hurt, or upset when he wants to get off the phone and hang out with his buds it's not because I feel neglected per se, it's because I'm jealous that they get to spend that time with him, taking our time away, and me being stuck here with my dogs, bed, and a candle. And it's just another reminder of something we can't do together. So I'm not the crazy jealous wife, at least not in the common understanding of the phrase.



On the up side the paperwork for everything has gone pretty smoothly and now we're really hoping to find a place and get me up there ASAP. So hopefully everything will fall into place in those departments.



On a completely different note I had a little bit of a panic today. Mom and I were sitting in our living room when out of the blue I started crying and asking her if I could handle moving so far and that snow balled into what I wanted to end up doing for my career. You see, when I entered college I knew I was going to be an elementary school teacher and I thought I would be good at it. Well after having a rough start to the program I decided over the summer that I wanted to be a Paralegal. But now I'm not sure of anything. I love the idea of being a part of a child's life, hopefully someone that can teach them a valuable lesson about life and themselves. But with moving around so much I don't know if I could do it. I certainly wouldn't earn tenure anywhere and trying to start all over in a new school would be difficult I think. If I were a Paralegal 1) I could receive the degree in 15 months. 2) I could strive to work for the Army as well, making my job transferable. 3) It pays a lot better. So I'm stuck. I want to change children's lives but I also need a job that is going to benefit my family and myself.....so my future is a mystery.



I don't know I guess I'm just having a panicky day. I'm not only stressing about Shawn's and my future but my personal future as well. Because I don't know what could happen in 10 years and I don't want to be a woman who all she knows to do is wait tables, cook, clean, change diapers, and write a blog. I want an education, I want to have goals again, and to really feel like I've accomplished something. I don't want to be 30 and realize that I didn't do anything I set out to do. I don't want to make that mistake. It's one of the reasons I fell in love with Shawn. Everyone around him (including me at one point) told him that he wouldn't amount to anything. So one day he "woke-up" and decided to change that. He decided to join the Army and make something out of himself. I'm sure he wondered if it was the right decision, and I'm sure he had moments of pure panic, but he did it regardless and that was one of the biggest factors of us getting back together. I want to do that so badly, to go after something with nothing held back. To be scared out of my mind and saddle up anyway (John Wayne, I know) but I'm havng such a hard time figuring out what it is I want.

Well I suppose that's enough rambling for one night. I'm hoping my next blog or two will bring some happier news or just a happier Jenn. I suppose we'll see. Tomorrow is work, packing, and getting my music for my last song at my church. Enjoy your weekend my friends. Sleep well. :)

Can't wait to get goin', not quite ready to leave

As the days come and go I am finding myself more and more anxious to be with my husband (something I'm getting used to saying). Between trying to get paperwork together, changing my name at one of the 50 places I have to do that at, looking at apartments, condos, houses, pricing cell phone plans, insurance and compiling a list of bills and "to-do's" and misc. expenses there are constant reminders about moving and I am ready to be there.

Now please don't misunderstand me when I say this. Just because I'm tired of being away from Shawn doesn't mean that leaving my family, friends, and what has been my home for 20 years is any easier. Although I do admit I think less about how much I'm going to miss everything here and more about how I can't wait to cook dinner for Shawn. :)

I think one of the things I'm going to miss the most is coffee time with my mom. Just the hour or two (or five) where we would just sit and recap about our days, worry about the ones we cared about, complain about who gets on our nerves, laugh over something silly, cry because of some tough situation we're facing, etc. Lately I've been handling it well, but actually I haven't thought about it much lately either. My mom is my best friend and leaving her and that special time together behind is going to be so hard. Leaving everything is going to be hard. I know I'm going to miss all the fun times at work, my best friend's and my's crazy nights together, the church family that has recently helped heal me in ways few understand, being able to walk around in my underwear and not be seen, having the ability to walk outside and ride or just visit my horses, being a 5 second walk from my parents, there's so much I'm leaving behind, so much I'm giving up to be with him. Which I wouldn't trade for anything in the world, which is maybe why I'm clinging so hard to moving with him.

I mean it makes sense. Shawn and I were talking about it a couple nights ago. Right now I have my girlfriends and my mom to make me laugh and feel good when I'm having a bad day. I have them to vent to when I'm frustrated with Shawn, life, school, work, whatever. Right now I have all these various outlets for my many, many emotions. In just a couple of weeks Shawn has to fulfill all of those spots until I find friends of my own. So it makes sense that I would so desperately want to be with him, because I feel like the longer I spend here the harder it will be to leave. So I find myself being less patient with my family, wanting to spend as much time with friends as possible, and dreading any type of work. Lol. I wish everything would just fall into place and that I can take a pill so the pain of leaving won't be so immense when it happens. *sigh*

On a slightly more positive side things are slowly but surely coming together for Shawn and I and my big move. Paperwork is getting filled out, officially I have changed my name, and we're trying to see where we can move and when I can get there. Anyway I hope everyone is doing well and you're getting prepared for Christmas which is also right around the corner. :)

Sadness, Today, Tomorrow, and the Future

So, as I promised, I must admit that last night was a bit rough on Shawn and I. We were both feeling kinda down about being a part and I felt just really depressed. It's definitely something that's been harder to deal with since getting married. All I want, all I can think about, is being with Shawn and moving to Alaska. So I wrote a little something to best describe how I was feeling.

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She looked quietly out the window, lost in her thoughts. Saying good-bye, or til next time, or see you soon or whatever you're supposed to say when you know you won't see a loved one for a long time is something that never gets any easier. Sadness temporarily overwhelmed her and tears slipped from beneath her lashes. She knew what she had signed up for but there were just moments when spending months a part and only talking on the phone just became sickening. And today she felt sick. All she wanted was to be in his arms again, laughing, smiling, cuddling, tickling his feet. Anything but being here on the couch watching Lifetime again. She sighed and looked out the window realizing for the first time that it was a getting dark outside. The only thing that made it better was knowing that tomorrow things may be different, probably would be different. Most days she wasn't like this. She found joy in seeing a cardinal, or a clear blue sky. She was optimistic and elated about being newly married and moving to her hubby's base soon; but today was just one of those days where missing him was all she could manage. So with the knowledge that tomorrow had the potential to be better, and knowing that sleep should be easily obtained she headed to bed; and fell asleep, silent tears staining her pillow.

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Today, on the other hand, has been a bit better. I had a wonderful nap and a good time with friends at work even if the money wasn't quite worth the trouble. And Shawn and I have really "clicked" today. He has been so good to me and is so patient when I'm kind of freaking out about various things.

Tomorrow is a full day. I need to get up and seriously get some laundry finished, otherwise I'm going to be walking around in pajama's all day. Then pick up my sister, take care of the puppies and horses, go to the doctor's and my banks, pick up the sister again, take care of the afternoon chores, grab a shower, and then head out to my cousin's for a "How I Met Your Mother" marathon and steaks cooked by her hubby. :) Then Tuesday will hopefully be another doctor's appt and getting things ready to move, so cleaning and packing basically. Oh and at some point I'm hoping to find my Boston a home this week and catch up on sleep.

On a completely different note, Shawn makes me exceedingly happy. And I am so lucky to have met, fell in love with, and married such an amazing man. I am so blessed to be able to share my life with him and to experience all the things we will get the chance to experience. We have not been without our share of ups and downs but we have come out on top despite it. There's something in his laughter that makes my heart melt and there's something in his touch, every time, that reassures me that everything is going to be ok; or that he'll never leave me. Neither of us are perfect but together I feel like we achieve something even better than perfection. Because it is because of our imperfections and our differences that making loving each other that much more worthwhile and special. It's so funny whenever I'm asked if I cried at my wedding I say no. Because, well, I didn't. But when it happened I felt weird not crying. But looking back on it and thinking about it more, I think the reason I didn't cry is because I knew that that is where I belonged. That there was no one I could be with that would be better for me and I just felt overwhleming joy to be there with him in that moment. And all I could do was smile and laugh and squeeze his hand. It was truly the happiest moment of my life. And I should have the professional pictures in hand on Saturday! So look for those soon!

Hope this finds all of you happy and well and I look forward to writing to you next time. :)

Layla, Paperwork, and Going to work

It has been a rough couple of days. First of all my mom bred one of her boxers a couple of months ago and monday night she went into labor, except 30 hours went by with no contractions or puppies. So Wednesday they were off to the vet. A couple hours later and being induced into labor Tess was given a C-section. Three puppies were stillborn, 1 had to be put down, and 1 mom brought home. We worked on the little girl, Layla, for 36 hours and after a good fight she passed away in the wee hours of this morning. A sad end to a hard beginning for the little girl, but at least she knew she was loved for a couple of days.

Today has been a day of running around trying to get things done for Shawn and my command sponsorship. I went and waited at the SS office for 30 minutes just to be told that I didn't have the correct paperwork, so I drove down to the courthouse about ten miles away, received the correct form, went back to the SS office, sat for another 30 minutes, received that paperwork, and then headed to the health dept (on the other side of the county), where I received some of the most rude service I have come across, sat for another 40 minutes just to be told that I needed to have an appointment, a 6 page booklet filled out, and a list of documents! CRAZY! SOOO I called my dad to complain about that and he informed me that I'm covered on his insurance until January so yay! Monday I'll be going to my physician with nice receptionists and no paperwork. :)

Today is also my first day back to work in 2 weeks. Which, if I didn't have such a trying day, would be exciting. Because I do miss my friends and my job. So I suppose I'll suck it up and go to work tonight. And maybe make some money even. Lol.

Other than that stuff it's been a relaxed couple of days. Hope everyone has an awesome weekend. :)

Wedding, Thanksgiving, Honeymoon, and Til next time

This day a week ago we were all rushing around getting ready because in just a few hours Shawn and I would be getting married. This morning I walked my handsome husband and soldier to his gate and said my temporary good-byes. Something that hasn't gotten any easier over the last few months. But before we go getting into that let me tell you about the wedding, Thanksgiving, and our honeymoon.

The wedding was...beautiful. My bridesmaids and I were up until 2 a.m. the night before doing last minute things and it all proved to be worth it. We went to my sister to get our hair and make-up done, except my mom did mine; and both ladies did an outstanding job. After rush, rush, rush to get everything done in time for the salon we came back to our side of town and literally ran into the church-office-turned-dressing-room stripping to get into our dresses in time for pictures. Then after all the fuss and running around the girls and mom and dad left and I had the office to myself where I was able to calm my frazzled nerves, and remember that in 20 minutes I was walking down the aisle to meet the rest of my life. My dog and ring bearer, Molly did wonderfully, my flower girl was adorable, the music was perfect, my Dad was teary-eyed, and my soldier was steady. My pastor prayed, my Dad gave my hand to Shawn, everyone's eyes on the two of us, our eyes met, and we went to step onto the altar and "plop." No I didn't fall but I did pull a Cinderella and lost my shoe. And let me just say that when you're wearing 8 layers of dress that's white and your shoe is white well trying to find and put that shoe back on is like trying to find Waldo in the last page of the book where everyone is wearing that stupid red and white striped shirt. Lol. But alas! My shoe was on, he squeezed my hand, I giggled and we continued up the stairs. Everything was wonderful. Afterwards we took pictures and spent some time together in the sanctuary. And then we headed to the reception!

It was beautiful. Beginning with our parents everyone in the wedding party was introduced and then Shawn and I were announced and we headed for the dance floor. "My Best Friend" played as I swayed in his arms and he tenderly kissed my forehead. He asked me if I wanted to try to spin and so I, very clumsily, spun out and came back to him. It was very..us. After our dance it was my Dad's turn. And that was awesome. :) "My Little Girl" played as he told me how proud he was of me and how important getting my education was...yes he even mentioned it in his toast. Lol. Shawn and his mom danced to "Through the Years" and after we sat down and enjoyed a yummy meal of roast beef, chicken, twice baked potatos, and rice. :) We spent the evening dancing, laughing, and spending the most precious day to us thus far with those who meant the most to us.

The next day was spent putting a list of gifts together and who sent them, paying a couple bills, and just relaxing with one another.

Thanksgiving was really nice. Spending dinner with my family and dessert with his. We cuddled, watched "How to Train Your Dragon", and got ready to leave for our honeymoon.

Friday morning we headed to Savannah with "Honeymoon Bound" "Honk, Honk" on the back of our truck from the bridal party. :) It was a nice drive. I read my book and cuddled against my new hubby while he drove and changed the music every 3 songs or so. Lol. Once we reached the historic city we grabbed a bite to eat and walked around a courtyard filled with art, touristy type stores, and horse drawn carriages. Once we were able to check into our room at the bed and breakfast we spent some time together and then got ready for dinner. It was a nice evening, not hot or too cool, just the right temp to walk a couple blocks to the restaraunt and then head back to the B&B for dessert and a movie. The next morning was a completely different story. 7:30 rolled around and I was running to the bathroom every 5 minutes. It was awful. I have never been that sick before, I was like that until 2:30. After feeling a little bit better Shawn and I ventured out to pick him out a pair of jeans and I came home with a sweet new wallet. When we got back to our room I laid down for a little bit and then started getting ready for dinner when Shawn got sick, and shortly thereafter I started feeling it again. So we cancelled our yummy dinner and our spooky ghost tour, and watched "Along Came Polly" and puked our guts out. :) The next morning we both felt well enough to enjoy breakfast at the B&B and go out on the town one last time before heading home. I drove halfway home and when we finally pulled into my driveway we basically went inside and passed out.

Monday was odd for me. I still wasn't feeling 100% and I was getting a bit testy. I was mad because Shawn was leaving but I didn't want to spend any time away from him, so instead I brooded beside him at breakfast and lunch. Lol. One minute I would want to get mad at him for having to go back and the next I would be crying because I didn't want him to leave. Poor guy probably had no idea what to do with me. He would try to be sweet and all I could do was glare. *sigh* Finally towards to late afternoon I pulled myself together and we were able to walk around one of my favorite parts of town and just enjoy being in one another's company. Later that night we had dinner with our families and had a really good time trading stories and given well wishes and everything.

Tuesday 2:45 AM came much too quickly. We loaded up my Dad's truck and made the hour drive to the airport. I received a gate pass and we kissed and hugged and I cried as I tried to keep reminding myself that I should be joining him in just a month or so.

That was yesterday. After spending lunch with Daddy and then most the afternoon sleeping I went to the wedding shower the ladies from my church were throwing for me. It was such an awesome time. We played games, ate wonderful food, and Shawn and I received some really nice gifts.

The last week feels like it's been the fastest one in my life. But it's no time for slowing down now. Now it's time to get all the paperwork properly filled out, sent in, and documented so we can get myself up there. :)

I hope all of you are doing well and enjoyed your Thanksgiving!!

It's Wedding Day!!!!

November 23, 2010. The day I will have the honor and privledge of marrying my best friend and the man of my dreams. Things have not been easy, we have gone through a break-up, came back together despite hestitancy, fell in love again, been apart for months, only communication being through letters, 2 days or 2 weeks being the most that we've seen each other in the last year, and I have absolutely no qualms about marrying him. Shawn has been my rock on several occassions, he can always make me laugh, and I would trust in with my life.

It amazes me how we have gotten here. Tomorrow, one year ago, he told me he didn't want a girlfriend while he was in boot camp, but despite trying to "protect" me from having to go through the long months without him it was a month later that I told him I'm either walking out for good or you have to deal with knowing I'm going to be waiting until after boot camp; and here we are.

Well I'm off to go get ready to go to the salon. Thank you everyone for the well wishes and congrats, it means a lot. :)

Love,

Me.

A Bit of Everything

4 Days and I will be married. I feel like it's non stop now. Today was shopping or working on the wedding. All I think about is "Did I get this?" "Did I check the price for this?" "Is this shade of purple going to match this shade?" "Are there enough bows?" "Will I like the greenery?" "When should I begin making the favors?" And on and on and on. On the plus side I don't have work Sat or Sun so I can 100% focus on getting everything into place with a couple of relaxing moments tucked in there. Saturday will be really nice. Me and my bridal party are going to my nail salon to get mani/pedis done. Today was actually a nice time with one of my bridesmaids. My best friend and I went shopping the previous two nights. The first night I didn't think I could find anything although I did like this one dress I just wasn't sure if I loved it. Then last night we went out again and I bought the best jeans ever. I haven't felt this way about jeans in a really long time. They even make my legs look good. :) And then I couldn't stop thinking about this one dress so I went ahead and got the dress today. And shopped for shoes for it, and fell in love with a super pretty pair of bronze/gold flip flops to go with this emerald green and gold dress. Anyway I think it will be super pretty for the honeymoon. In 80 (give or take) hours I will be picking my wonderful husband to be up from the airport and we wil be dashing all around Central Florida to get everything finished in time.

I found out some other really neat news today. My brother, sister-in-law, and niece are going to be able to make it to the wedding which really means a lot to me. It really made me happy to hear from her this evening. Speaking of this evening I also worked on and potentially (waiting on the pastor's approval) finished the ceremony program. I think it came out really nice. It was also a nice way to include my grandmother, uncle, and aunt who have all passed away. I know that my Dad was really touched by that, which made me happy. Everything at the church seems to be getting ready too. I put together 2 slideshows, one for while people are finding their seats and another for a part of the ceremony. Both of those turned out really nice too.

I found out a couple days ago that Shawn and I will most likely be living off post for the first couple of months once I move. It kind of worries me from the aspect of money, but I'm hoping between the increase in his paycheck and me being able to go back to working 6 days instead of 4 once school's out, that we'll be able to come up with everything.

I am so looking forward to our honeymoon. We decided that we do want to do a ghost tour, and we're definitely visiting the Historic District, and taking lots and lots of pictures. :) I've also arranged for when we get back that we're going to meet with a good friend of mine who likes to do photography to kind of drive around town to Shawn's and my's favorite spots and take some nice pictures of us in our wedding attire, something I don't think many couples get the chance to do. Especially everywhere we're going to try to hit.

Then that Tuesday unfortunately he goes back home, BUT it's the same day as my wedding shower which is super exciting. The ladies from my church came together and are throwing me a wedding shower which just really touched me. In fact when Mom told me I started tearing up. You see, I've really struggled the last few years especially with other Christians, but that just really made me feel special, so if any of you ladies are reading this thank you so much, you truly don't know how much it means to me. :) And a special thanks to my pastor's wife for arranging it.

The other thing I'm really excited about next week is the movie "Burlesque" comes out and you can bet your money that I am dragging my new hubby to see that movie the day after we're married. :) OH! And it's of course Thanksgiving amidst all this other hustle and bustle which is also super exciting because I'll be enjoying my husband's and my's first Thanksgiving, and we're having lots of family over with a big meal. I'm baking this super delicious recipe my grandmother taught me a couple weeks ago. It's called pineapple casserole, I know it sounds gross but its yummy. Promise.

Well this blog is a little bit all over the place but that's basically how I feel right now anyway so I suppose it fits. I hope the rest of you have a wonderful day and enjoy your weekend!!

Favorite Part of the Day & 7 days!!

Most people when asked what part of the day is your favorite say "afternoon" or "morning" or "evening" etc. But my favorite part of the day normally only lasts but a few moments and it doesn't typically happen every day, although there have been whole days of it, or several moments throughout one day. It's that moment when everything within you is quiet, when you can close your eyes take a deep breath and realize that everything is going to be not only ok, but wonderful. Most the times I find this moment when no one else is around and I am just quietly enjoying the day. I have found this in a variety of circumstances though. A few weeks ago it was when I walked outside my house and there was this perfect breeze and it was absolutely gorgeous outside and in that moment I felt like (this may sound a bit odd) but like God hugged me gently and said "Have a good day." Other times I have felt it while pounding the Earth atop one of the horses that let me escape from the realities of being a teenager. Or it was while my mom held me as I cried over someone who broke my heart. Lol. Today it was when the house was quiet and I was fixing a cup of hot tea when it dawned on me that despite how stressed and worried I was in just a week I was going to marry my best friend. The only man who has made me fall in love again and again, who can make me laugh when I felt like crying, and the only man who completes me in ways I didn't know was possible. In just 183 hours I will be married! I will begin my journey as an Army Wife, but I also begin a journey about myself. Finding out what I'm made of. I want to graduate with my Paralegal degree and help raise a beautiful family, one that supports my husband and our troops. I want to make a difference in the lives of the people I meet along the way. As difficult as it will be leaving my family and everything I know and love here I am really looking forward to this new beginning.

As far as today goes it's been a good one. I got the timelines put together save for a couple of glitches I've run into. I had a nice lunch with my mom and grandma and now I'm updating the blog before I pick up my little sister and head to class. Later tonight my best friend and I are going shopping for an outfit for Shawn's and my's fancy honeymoon dinner. My sister reccommended a nice restaurant for us to go and I'm super excited about it. Actually I'm just super excited about being able to spend a few a days with him without worrying about if there's a sergeant about to walk in, or if there's a formation he has to go to, or having someone to meet for dinner or whatever. So anyway I hope everything is going well for you and thanks for checking in. :)

8 days and being sick

8 days, 8 days, 8 days. So i-n-s-a-n-e. I bounce back and forth between being super duper excited to feeling like I'm completely unprepared. There's still 100 things to do, but I have accomplished a lot. I'm going to sit down with one of my famous "to-do" lists and decide what needs to be done tomorrow and Thursday. Right now though I'm watching "BONES" with my family. Speaking of family my Uncle brought my Nonnie over to spend some time with us before the wedding. I really hope I can assemble the centerpieces tomorrow because that will be one less thing to do this weekend. I also need to put together a seating chart, timelines, a photo want list, a packing list for the honeymoon, day after list for the day after the wedding, and on and on and on. Lol. But I should be able to finish it all as long as I can stay focused. Lol.

It's almost surreal how close it is. I will be with Shawn this time next week. OMG I am getting so so excited. I also spoke with FRG in Alaska and I'm hoping to start getting housing squared away as well. Which will be awesome. I cannot wait for Shawn to come home to me, to learn how to cook together, to argue about how towels should go in the bathroom, whose turn it is to walk the dog, to cuddle on the couch with a movie, or go shopping for our home's decor, or appliances, or whatever. *sigh* I am so elated.

Well I think that's about it tonight, I know boring, but that's been my day. Tomorrow should be better though. Enjoy your week my friends. :)

Dragons, Meeting Again, First Dates, and Work

10 days until the wedding and I almost can't believe it. To think that this time in two weeks I'll be in the B&B in my husband's arms is just absolutely amazing. And despite all of the complications, and stress, and everything I know that there will be nothing compared to the joy of walking down the aisle to the man of my dreams.

What's really interesting is that at this time last year we had just gotten back in touch with one another. Neither of us sure what it meant. We hadn't spoken in 6 months and we weren't even sure if there would be anything left after being a part for so long. All I knew is that I hadn't stopped thinking about him since that last kiss when we said good-bye. I compared any guy I met to him, and all I wanted was someone that made me feel half as a amazing as he made me feel. And the rest is history as they say.

I must say though it has not been an easy year. Neither of our friends were all that supportive of the relationship because of how upsetting the break-up had been to both of us, and the moment we really did start falling for one another again he left for Infantry Training. But oddly enough between the couple of times we had together, the dozens of letters, and the hundreds of phone calls I fell more completely and deeply in love with him even more than the first time we dated. He is the most amazing man. Ya know, he is so amazing at the little things. I'm not sure how many of you know but he carved our initials in my tree, and one time after a particuraly hard day at work he brought me flowers just cause. :)

My other favorite thing about Shawn and I is his ability to make me laugh. 9 out 10 times he can make me laugh in any situation. He almost always sees the glass as half full and with him there's a bright side to everything. Whenever I get upset about something we have this running joke that he's going to buy me a dragon to make it up to me. You see I have this ridiculous obsession with owning a dragon (yes I know they're mythical creatures.) But I really want one nonetheless. And although I love the movie "How to Train Your Dragon" those aren't the kind of dragons I want. I want the dragon like Saphira from Eragon. She's super fast, intelligent, and pretty. Although at this point a dragon like Toothless would be pretty awesome too. I know its completely ridiculous but oh well.

I'm really missing Shawn today. I normally get like this when he goes out to see a movie with friends or a dinner or something the Army is hosting that, if I were there, I could accompany him. But I'm here and not there so I can't. And I'm just so ready to be able to see a movie with him and not worry about being somewhere at a certain time to meet a certain someone. Ugh. The last couple of days have been rough and I feel bad because I took it out on Shawn last night. I feel really controlled lately and he said I couldn't have this adorable little puppy and I got all upset and said it wasn't fair and more or less threw a temper tantrum. *sigh* Poor guy has no idea what he's in for. Lol. I'm kidding, I rarely get the way I did last night but it's funny (now). I don't know the time we have had together these last 11 months has been more precious because we've been able to spend so little face to face time with him and I appreciate how amazing that is, but on the other hand I yearn for a normal, get sick of each other, we're up one another's butts too much, let's argue about what way the toliet paper should go, relationship too. Oh well, I suppose I'll have that aspect of it soon enough...speaking of soon enough....

My little sister went on her first date tonight to the fair with a couple of friends. A double date really but still a date and omg does it kinda freak me out. It's weird seeing her as a young lady when it feels like it was only yesterday I was helping her ride Cally. (Her first horse.) She really has turned into quite the young lady, being both a good person and pretty. I know I'm going to miss driving her crazy when I move.

I'm really looking forward to my work's new monthly get together. We're basically having a big Thanksgiving Dinner with people from work. And what's better is its the night of the wedding rehearsal so everyone will get a chance to meet Shawn before the wedding. I'm actually super stoked about it. I think I'm going to make my new favorite dessert, pineapple casserole. I know it sounds disgisting but seriously, its yummy. :)

Well it's 2 am and I have to be leaving the house and ready for work at 8 because of a stupid meeting so I guess its time to say good night my friends. And I hope this finds you and yours well. :)

Veteran's Day and Centerpieces

Happy Veteran's Day friends. I hope all of you were able to take the time and thank a past and/or present military person. It's today that we are reminded about the sacrifice it takes to keep this wonderful country free. I am proud to say that my father and brother both served. My Dad was a sergeant in the USAF and my brother served in the USMC, although I'm not sure for how long or his rank. And of course my fiance is currently serving in the US Army. I'm proud of them but also proud of the handful of friends I know who have and/or are serving. And I personally thank any and all veterans, past and present for your service, sacrifice, and allegiance to this nation.

That being said I spent my veteran's day with one of my bridesmaid's doing bouquets and centerpieces. It is amazing how expensive a wedding is. Absolutely crazy. But lucky for us everything we bought was 50% off which was super duper exciting. After spending a couple hours in Hobby Lobby and laughing at our silly selves we headed to grab a super yummy lunch at Ruby Tuesday's and would you believe that they started serving Garlic Cheese Biscuits?!

After lunch we spent some time at Plato's Closet and let me just say that I'm super excited about finding this place! I know exactly where I'll be buying my honeymoon clothes. :)

Speaking of my honeymoon I am so excited about where we're going. It was recommended by my sister that we should go to Savannah, Ga and so that's where we decided to go. A historic little town with cobblestone walkways, majestic oaks, and quaint beds and breakfasts. Shawn and I are staying at a really sweet B&B complete with robes, desserts and coffee, and a courtyard. Not that I'm easily impressed. lol. The other thing that I really like about going there is its a four hour drive. Long enough to listen to some good music and have great conversations but not too long to get butt cramps. Lol.

Other than that it's been an easy day and evening. Only 11 days left until the wedding and only 10 until I get to pick up my baby from the airport. Is it odd that I'm really excited about picking him up? It'll be my first time picking up someone from the airport instead of the other way around. And what's even greater is that I'm picking up my husband to be! I plan on making a shirt for this too. Something cute and telling everyone that I'm there to pick up my future husband. :)

Anyway friends, tomorrow is TGIF I hope you enjoy your weekend. I may not post until Monday because weekends are so busy but you'll here from me soon!

12 Days, The Jitters, and Alaska Really?!

Well ladies and gentlemen it is 12 days until the wedding and slowly but surely things are falling into place. Tomorrow Lacy, one of my bridesmaids, and I go to handle the rest of the bouquets and the centerpieces which is pretty exciting. RSVPs are coming in, the menu has been set, ceremony timeline put together, etc etc.

It's kinda funny with the wedding so close I have a few of my friends asking me "Are you nervous?" "Do you have the jitters?" And it's odd? maybe, I don't know. But I don't. I'm stressed over everything falling into place properly and for things to happen without anything insane going wrong but where Shawn and I are concerned I'm 100% solid in everything.

The other thing is that people keep reminding me how isolated I'll be in Alaska especially once he leaves and they encourage me to reconsider the option of staying home until he comes home from deployment. And don't get me wrong I don't think it's going to be a cake walk or even easy. But I do think I'm ready for it and I do have a couple things in my favor. 1) During this winter Shawn and I will be together and I'll be able to "learn the ropes" so to speak about the roads, driving conditions, clothing, what to do when I'm snowed in, etc. 2) When Shawn deploys it will be beginning to enter Spring. I'll be able to get out and really get involved outside doing whatever. Hiking, riding (there's a couple stables locally), and I also think I'm going to pick up painting; plus this blog of course. I also plan on getting a job immediately and going to school in one facet or another. Whether it's online, at UAF, or a mix of both I'll be busy with that as well. 3) I'm a pretty personable person and will make friends and they do have groups for the army wives (and husbands.)

Anyway getting off that soapbox. I am so excited about this new life I'm starting. Not many people get a fresh start, in a completely new place, with the person that means the most to them, in one of the prettiest places on earth; and I get that chance. I get to experience all of it. The snow, the ice, the ridiculously cold temperatures, the cuddling by the fireplace, making flavored vodka (thanks to my manager), learning how to cook, buying long underwear to fit under my jeans....in fact Shawn told me today that if I wanted to wear jeans that I needed to buy them in a size that I could fit layers under them....and all I'm thinking during this is there are other warm pants besides jeans?! What is this strange clothing I know nothing about? lol.

Well everyone thanks for checking in and I hope you enjoy the rest of your night or morning depending on when you read this. <3

Get to know me and my soldier

Hey everyone!! First of all thanks so much for checking out my blog and let me just tell you that I am super excited about beginning this journey and this blog. I know that the ones that become my first readers will most likely know Shawn and I and how we met but I'm really hoping that this blog will become a favorite among women and especially women who go through the same I have and will. So here's a little but about him and me as individuals and then our story. :)

I am 20 years old and a working college student. I live at home with my parents for another month and a half before I make the big move to Alaska. I'm a waitress and going to college to become...something. lol. I was 100% sure that I wanted to become a teacher but I decided that wasn't quite me, so I've switched to either a paralegal or an accountant. I have 2 dogs, although I'm having to find a home for my Boston Terrier because of the move. I also have 2 horses and am selling them too. Horses have been a huge part of my life since I was 4. I have ridden over 150 horses, trained, given lessons, done demonstrations, educational camps, etc. But as this new chapter begins that chapter is temporarily closed. I consider myself a strong person, easy to approach, loyal, honest, trustworthy, caring, and someone who is determined and accomplished. My friends consider me a confidante and someone who they can depend on. I think I'm funny but sometimes I'm the only one who does.

My fiance is 26 going on 27. He is a soldier in the US Army and will deploy in the recent future. He has been divorced once a couple of years ago and has since moved back to Florida. He worked for a company installing invisible dog fences for a couple years and lived with his best friend who also joined with him. He had 1 dog that he loved named Duke and had to give him up when he moved into his best friend's place. His music is his outlet for stress and just to have a good time. He has played the bass guitar in a couple of bands and he knows how to play the acoustic and I think he has quite the voice. I think he would consider himself to be a strong person as well. He is easy to approach, loves to make people laugh, trustworthy, and an someone easy to talk to.

The funny thing about Shawn and I is that at first glance we are polar opposites. When we dated the first time he was 100% rocker guy complete with music, metallica truck, tattoos, and piercings. I on the other hand have a tattoo of a duck and like country, easy listening, and 106.7. I wore American Eagle and boots and he wore Metallica shirts and ripped jeans. But despite our opposite appearances we completed one another.
We met at Cracker Day, a rodeo for our county all about horses, cattle, southern cooking, and a good tan out in the Florida heat. We were both with other people at the time but we ran in the same circles and ran into each other often. My best friend at the time was his as well. A couple weeks after him and the girl he was seeing at Cracker Day broke up he asked my girlfriend if she knew any single cute girls and she gave him a girl's number. Her name was also Jenn and on accident he called me. We talked for a couple minutes and he hung up. The next day he called me again and asked if he could take me on a date. July 4, 2008 was our first date. We kissed for the first time under the fireworks and then hung out at a bonfire. It was perfect. For ten months we dated, and I fell in love with him again and again. But we weren't ready to commit 100% to a relationship so we broke-up for 6 months and didn't talk.
It was during that 6 months that he joined the Army and I decided that I didn't want to go through life without him anymore. A week before Thanksgiving we got in touch again and had breakfast, and I fell in love again the moment I saw him. He looked all cool with his sunglasses, cowboy hat and boots, and jeans. Neither of us was sure why we came back to each other, why we never forgot or completely fell out of love with the other but we did.
On January 19th he left for Infantry Training in Georgia. We weren't able to speak much for the first two months but I got to see my handsome army boyfriend on April 2nd after a trying 8 1/2 hour drive. In May he graduated from basic. In June he finally came home for two weeks surprising me at work. The day he left for Alaska he proposed right before he got on the airplane. I went to visit him in August right before school started and he proposed to me again, except this time with my actual engagement ring. He had our waiter put it in our champagne glasses at dinner, it was adorable.

Now we are 13 days to the wedding and I could not be more excited. I hope you can join Shawn and me on this new journey. I want to write everything down. The good, the bad, the wonderful, the awful, all of it. So my readers can see what being an Army wife is all about, and find out along with me what it all entails. I am really excited over this blog, and I hope you are too.

Thanks for reading,

Jenn